| Introduction | |
11 | What Is Gay Science? | |
12 | The Gay Scientific Method | |
Part 1 | Natural Sciences | 15 |
| Biology | |
| Biological Classification | 16 |
| Why Do Gays Love Drama? | 20 |
| Power Lesbians, the Stem Cells of the LGBTQ+ | 24 |
| Why Are Gay Men Terrible Drivers? | 28 |
| Why Do Gay Men Color Their Hair in a Crisis? | 33 |
| Why Do Gay Men Love the Worst Music You've Ever Heard? | 37 |
| What Are Guncles? | 40 |
| Anatomy | |
| Why Do Gay Guys Like Them Big? | 42 |
| Pathology | |
| LGBTQ+ Bacteria, Viruses, and Diseases | 46 |
| Microbiology | |
| Do Lesbians Hate Electricity? | 50 |
| Why Do Queer People Age Differently? | 56 |
| Physics | |
| Why Do Gay Relationships Feel Longer than Straight Ones? | 58 |
| Gay Face | 60 |
| What Is Bi Panic? | 64 |
| Fluid States of Matter | 67 |
| The Gravitational Pull of Gray Sweatpants | 69 |
| Chemistry | |
| The Periodic Table of LGBTQ+ Elements | 71 |
| Why Do Women and Gay Men Get Along So Well? | 74 |
| Geology | |
| How Does Gaydar Work? | 84 |
| Oceanography | |
| Navigating Gay Friend Groups | 90 |
| Genetics | |
| Why Are Gay Coworkers Either Best Friends or Mortal Enemies? | 96 |
| Nutrition | |
| Why Do Gay Men Like Iced Coffee? | 101 |
| Botany | |
| Plant Gays, Explained | 104 |
| Zoology | |
| Why Can't Queer Men Remember Each Other's Names? | 106 |
| Why Do Gay Men Run Like That? | 110 |
| Gay Hookup-to-Friends Life Cycle | 112 |
| Closeted Hibernation | 114 |
| Ecology | |
| Why Can't Queers Sit in a Chair Properly?116 | |
| Why Do Queer Men Love Camp but Hate Camping? | 120 |
| Astronomy | |
| Are There Signs of Queer Life in Outer Space? | 122 |
Part 2 | Social Sciences | 127 |
| Anthropology | |
| Are Vers-Bottoms Going Extinct? | 128 |
| Will Bottoms Survive the Apocalypse? | 130 |
| The DIY Lesbian, Explained | 136 |
| Disney Gays, Explained | 138 |
| Education | |
| Why Are Gay Boys Always the Female Teacher's Favorite? | 140 |
| Does College Make People Bi? | 142 |
| History | |
| Are LGBTQ+ People Responsible for All These Hurricanes? | 144 |
| Why Do Gay Men Wear Harnesses? | 148 |
| Law | |
| A New Queer World Examined: What if the Gays Were in Charge? | 153 |
| Linguistics | |
| Why Do Gay Men Talk Like That? | 156 |
| Did Trans People Invent Pronouns? | 158 |
| Demography | |
| Gay Dating and Open Relationships | 161 |
| Psychology | |
| Why Do Gay Men Feel Powerful Immediately After a Haircut? | 168 |
| Why Do Gay Men Choose Difficult Vacation Spots? | 170 |
| Doppelbängers | 174 |
| Why Do Same-Sex Parents Raise Happier Kids? | 176 |
| Communication Studies | |
| Why Do Gay Guys Write Like Girls? | 178 |
| Sociology | |
| Game-Night Lesbians, Explained | 184 |
| Horror-Genre Gays, Explained | 186 |
| What Does It Mean to Be Intersex? | 188 |
| Are Pansexual People Living Better Lives? | 190 |
| The Gay Social Order | 196 |
| Economics | |
| The Big Gay Economy | 198 |
| Criminology | |
| LGBTQ+ Crime and Punishment | 202 |
Part 3 | Formal Sciences | 205 |
| Forensics | |
| Are Gay People Bad at Math? | 206 |
| The Mathematics Behind a Throuple | 208 |
| Engineering | |
| Are Aromantic People Robots? | 210 |
| Compliter Science | |
| What Does It Mean to Be Non-Binary? | 212 |
| Logic | |
| LGBTQ+ Logic, Reasoning, and Fallacies | 215 |
| Acknowledgments | 222 |
| The Gloss | 223 |
| Index | 231 |
| About the Author | 237 |